The footage is remarkably clear. We see a room with a plush chair and a floral-patterned sofa, paneled walls, and orchids on the windowsill. A young man in loose sweatpants and a burgundy Harvard sweater looks briefly around the room. He fiddles quickly with something in the corner of the room before surreptitiously stuffing a white box into his back pocket. Finally, he adjusts the hidden camera.
The room is the conservatory of the Ritz Hotel in London, and the man is alleged to be Alistair Barclay, the nephew of Sir Frederick Barclay, then the co-owner of the luxury hotel, with his twin brother Sir David Barclay.
Sir Frederick and his daughter Amanda are now suing Alistair Barclay and two of his brothers for invasion of privacy, breach of confidence, and breach of data protection laws. They allege that their nephew and cousin planted a bugging device disguised as an electric plug adaptor in the room where Sir Frederick liked to hold his business meetings. The bug enabled them to hear Sir Frederick’s conversation with a potential buyer who had offered £1.3bn for the hotel. Sir David’s family instead sold the hotel for half the price to a Qatari businessman. “One is left to speculate why,” the suit says.
It’s a lurid tale. The Barclays Brothers, whose business empire includes the Telegraph Media Group, the online retail Very Group, and delivery business Yodel, are said to be worth about £8 billion ($9.8 billion). The identical twins used to be so close that they lived together in a castle on the island of Brecqhou. Now they and their children are bugging conversations and throwing lawsuits at each other, and over amounts which, though substantial are not going to change their lives. There are few things that you can do with $5 billion that you can’t do with $4 billion.
The Barclays Brothers, and their families, aren’t the only super-rich people who don’t seem like the nicest human beings on Earth. Australian minerals heiress Gina Rinehart has proposed using nuclear bombs instead of dynamite to mine iron ore and create a harbor to export it. Bernie Madoff ripped off thousands of clients on his way to building his own fortune. Jared Kushner’s father served fourteen months in prison after pleading guilty to eighteen counts of illegal campaign contributions, tax evasion, and witness tampering. The witness tampering charge came after Kushner hired a prostitute to seduce his brother-in-law who was co-operating with the police. He then sent recordings of the encounter to his sister.
A recent study found that the chances that a driver would stop at a crosswalk to let a pedestrian cross the street fell by 3 percent for every extra $1,000 their car costs. The researchers noted that without interviewing the drivers, they couldn’t tell why they were less likely to stop but they argued that “disengagement and a lower ability to interpret thoughts and feelings of others along with feelings of entitlement and narcissism may lead to a lack of empathy for pedestrians.”
The world is full of examples of rich people who appear to have no moral boundaries and no qualms about hurting others, even their own families, in order to achieve their goals and accumulate their wealth. Of course, there are also plenty of rich people—Warren Buffett, Jack Ma, Pierre Omidyar—who have managed to get rich without damaging their reputations, but is there a link between being mean and being wealthy? Or to put in another way, are you too nice to be rich?
Agreeableness and the Value of Money
It’s a question that researchers have investigated. Earlier this year, two scientists published a study they had conducted into the correlation between agreeableness and financial hardship. Altogether, they conducted no fewer than seven surveys, asking people in the UK about the size of their assets and debts, how much they earned and how much they saved. They reviewed volunteers’ bank accounts and looked across different regions.
They also surveyed their volunteers’ agreeableness. They asked the volunteers whether they saw themselves as rude to others, whether they were forgiving, and whether they were kind and considerate. One survey looked at their negotiation styles, asking the volunteers whether they usually accommodate the wishes of others. The researchers hypothesized that agreeable people would be more cooperative in negotiations, and that their generosity would produce negative financial outcomes. Agreeable people, they assumed, give up easily in negotiations and fail to drive a hard bargain.
They also theorized that any relationship between agreeableness and a luck of funds could be explained by highly agreeable people simply placing a lower subjective value on money. They don’t care about it as much so they’re less motivated to earn it.
The first idea didn’t pan out. The study didn’t find any evidence that people who are generous during negotiations, or who are more willing to compromise, are less likely to have savings. But their second hypothesis did turn out to be true: agreeableness was found to have a “highly significant direct effect on the subjective importance of money”—and that in turn did have a highly significant effect on their savings.
In other words, people who are nice also tend not to think too much about money. It doesn’t motivate them. In particular, agreeable people with low incomes would have lower amounts of savings, higher levels of debt, and were more likely to go bankrupt than people who were less agreeable.
The researchers didn’t speculate on how exactly the low subjective value that agreeable people place on money leads to owning less of it. It is, after possible to get rich without trying. An agreeable person could choose to enter a high-paying profession such as law or finance for the social rewards or the mental challenge rather than for the money. An entrepreneur can develop a product because they enjoy building it, then sell the company once they’ve found their invention works. Steve Wozniak has described creating the first Apple computer not because he was hoping lots of people would buy it and he would make a lot of money but because he wanted one and it didn’t exist. “I did it not for a company. I did it because I wanted it myself,” he said. You don’t have to love money to end up owning it.
Art Markman, a cognitive scientist, has suggested three possible reasons that nice people often finish financially last. Agreeable people, he says, might be too generous. In order to be liked they might be more willing to give or lend money to friends and family even when they can’t afford it.
They may also value social interactions more than they care about money. Instead of saving for a rainy day, they’ll be more likely to treat themselves to a night out with friends or take a vacation that they can barely afford if it means that they get a chance to build closer bonds with other people. They may regard rich people who have no time with their friends or family as leading lives that are more financially secure but poorer in ways that matter to them.
Markman also wonders whether agreeableness has a negative effect on career progression. “Agreeable people might not advocate for themselves enough,” he speculates, “which could lead them to be passed over for raises or promotions.” In other words, disagreeable types might not be very friendly or very likable but their sharp elbows and their loud voices attract the attention they need to get ahead.
Another study supports that idea. Drawing on data from the British Household Panel Study, a social and economic research study, the author found that agreeable people did tend to have lower incomes than disagreeable people. They also had lower occupational status.
Both income and the status depend on the job, but different kinds of work have shown a correlation between different personality types. People who score highly on agreeableness, for example, are less likely to take jobs that require stalking cheating spouses or drilling new military recruits. They are more likely to choose to become nurses, social workers or teachers, jobs that tend to be relatively low paid but which are highly rewarding and win the approval and high regard of others. What’s not clear, however, is whether those jobs are low paid because lots of people can do them or whether the people who do them are agreeable and therefore less likely to demand a pay rise. The low pay may also put off disagreeable people who are more motivated by money, leaving only agreeable people in hospitals and teacher common rooms.
Managers also need to be willing to make themselves unpopular by handing out difficult shifts, disciplining staff, and laying people off. That’s harder to do if you score highly in agreeability, leaving difficult people more likely to climb the greasy pole. Disagreeable people may also be more willing to knock on the boss’s door, explain why they’re worth more than they’re being paid, and demand a raise, even if that risks an argument.
Nice Guys Don’t Have to Finish Last
So the idea that nice people finish last does appear to have some legs. Studies have found that agreeable people don’t care much about money. They gravitate towards low-paid but rewarding jobs, and they’re less likely to seek promotion or be promoted.
But there’s a limit to how far disagreeableness will get you—and to the penalty agreeableness levies. In most workplaces, being nice isn’t a luxury that the company can’t afford; it’s a requirement of the job that doesn’t conflict with being able to make tough decisions. In one survey of what leaders look for in candidates for promotion, characteristics included being free of drama, being a team member, offering to help, and not expecting to be rewarded, as well as smiling, and socializing at the office party. All of those characteristics are more likely to be found in people who are agreeable than those who are demanding, difficult, and confrontational. Bosses, after all, have to work with the people they promote.
So what can you do if you want to be liked but also want to be rich and successful?
The first thing you can do is to take an agreeability test. There’s no shortage of tests available, and they’ll give you some idea of how agreeable you really are. We all think we’re nice and friendly until a test—or someone else—tells us otherwise.
If you achieve a high score in agreeableness, accept that as long as you prioritize being liked, some high-paying jobs just won’t suit you. You can still build a business, create a successful product, and compete with other companies. But you might not enjoy life as a corporate lawyer—or as a loan shark.
You should, however, develop some healthy financial habits. Money might not interest you but it does become a lot more interesting when you don’t have any. Know how much you’re earning, watch how much you’re spending, and make sure that the first is always bigger than the second. Part of being agreeable is not having to make financial requests of friends and relatives. People will like you more if you have to turn down the odd night out than if you have to ask them for help.
But ultimately, the most important thing is to understand that the low subjective value that agreeable people place on money is offset by the high subjective value that they place on personal relationships. Your niceness might make it harder to be financially wealthy but it makes it easier to have the kind of human relationships that are worth much more. Owning The Ritz isn’t as valuable as good friends and a loving family.
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